I Don't Know How To Do This

     I know that we have all heard this phrase many times. Probably we have even muttered it ourselves.

     Maybe when we first tried roller skating, writing, singing, you name it.

     I heard it applied to something the other day that I never thought of applying it to.

    Carrying on our life after a loved one has died. It was said by a young woman who had just lost her husband and was left with small children to raise by herself. She looked at the woman giving her condolences, and said, " I don't know how to do this."

     In this situation, none of knows how to do it, until we have to do it.

    I have been using this phrase in my head a lot this year. I don't know how to be a cancer victim. As a matter fact, I am not sure I am a victim. To me that is someone who has been damaged and broken. I am neither of those things. Neither do I consider myself a cancer survivor, and apparently, my doctor agrees with me. He wants to see me for check-ups a lot, at least for five years, which is the usual bench
mark for being declared cured.

     When this all started my main focus was on the surgery. I am a surgery survivor. No one really seems too interested in that, but it means a great deal to me. I had never survived surgery before, so it was kind of cool to be one. I also never considered the cancer part of the diagnosis, because the doctors and nurses we saw kept saying that if you must have cancer, this is the one to have, because it is contained and remove the container and you are done. NO ONE said, radiation, follow-up checks, or good ol' pelvic exams necessary, until after the surgery, I have done well, thanks to God and good doctors. If you do not believe good doctors are a gift of God, you have never been sick.

     That is also one my "not done this befores". I have not been sick. I don't consider myself sick, now, but I do have a lot of doctors to see. I am learning to do this. Because I have not been sick, I find myself really reluctant to share my concerns with doctors and nurses. Do I tell them every time my elimination is different? Why? Most of my life it varied with what I ate, did and how rested I was. Why should I tell them? I don't unless it is really different for me. And there is the answer. Know your self.

     While I am still on the " don't know how to do this", may I just say I don't know how to be old either.
I know that to a lot of people being in your sixties is not old. Let me tell you, it is compared to 40. I do not want to be old. I can be older, which are two very different items.

     I probably won't be considered mature by a lot of standards, either. I have so much fun being immature that maturing isn't on my list.

     I have had a good time learning to do things in my life: being a wife, a mom a grandmother. I think that when we think we cannot do something that is hard, God is there saying," I can." We need to let him and enjoy the ride.

     Here's to enjoying the ride and the learning.

Social Networks

     Since the advent of the personal computer in all its forms, we have become a people of social networks on the world wide web, not face to face people.

     I find this a little disconcerting, since, being older than dirt, we always networked in person. That is a little misleading. I mean that you talked to a person, be it face to face, telephone or written word. It was personal, civilized and easy to read the other person.

     Now, it is cold, non-personal and on the web for the entire world to see.

     There really is nothing wrong in that as long as you can still make it personal and only to those you want it to go to. Okay, just showed how naive I can be, since a lot of people can see what you post on these social networks.

      I also appreciate the opportunity I have to keep up with people who are not a part of my everyday society.

      It does annoy me to have people use this network to announce things that should be told to family and close friends privately and seperately before the world knows.

      I know people who have learned of marriages, pregnancies, deaths and divorces through these networks, before being told by the person, either in person on phone, email or face to face. To me this usually means that the announcement is going to cause upheaval and they are wanting to avoid that. Well, upheaval makes us stronger.

      I have no problem with these announcements if they are just reiteration for family and friends and now the rest of the world gets to know.

     Please be kind to each other and don't pop these kinds of things on the world wide web, before telling your mother.

     Have a great day and love each other to the best of your ability.

Sewing

     I have discovered over time, that I have many talents.

     Sewing is not one of them. Please, those of you to whom it comes easy, don't tell me anyone can sew. You are right. Anyone can sew, however, not all of us can sew and keep our sanity.

     I have in the past, sewn squaredance clothes for me and my daughter, never tried shirts, they have to fit too well, and snaps are difficult to put on, anyway, I did that and did rather well. Wore them in public and no one snickered. Not so I knew, anyway.

      I even made a cheerleader outfit for my daughter one year for Christmas and it was good.

      However, our kids are all grown and never had any desire to sew for the grandkids. So, other than patching and shortening some curtains in the past few years, no real sewing.

       Now, the Grinch shows up. We went to an auction a while back and found a box of material that Virg's aunt could use for quilts. A lot of it was, however, little animals and books to put together. She didn't want those. So, I kept them. Thinking I would find someone who would want them or sell them at my next garage sale.

      Then, a friend stopped in with her little boy, nine months old, and I thought how cute it would be to make one of the books for him. The books are the Christmas story, so thought I had plenty of time to put it together, since this was August.

     About the same time, I found out I as going to be a great-grandma by our eldest granddaughter, so, decided to make one for baby Sophie.
Ummmmmm, yeah, good idea.

      Today, I got out the sewing machine, meaning I opened it up and found I had to thread a bobbin with white thread. I have 12 bobbins, none of which were white, which is what it takes. I set everything up and put the bobbin on the spindle, white thread on the thread spindle and went to work.

      Almost.

     The bobbin didn't fit. I couldn't get the clutch bar to push into it so that the brake would work when the bobbin was full.

    Changed bobbins.

    Didn't fit.

    Discovered that you have to put the little   tip in the little hole on the bobbin. Got that done. Started to thread bobbin. Started smelling hot oil.

    Goodie.

    Called hubby in to see what he could do. He finally found the places to oil, we got the machine in the right position and oiled. Put the machine back where I could use it and...........I started sewing.

     Fortunately, it was waste material, as the bobbin thread wadded up on the bottom of the material.

     Changed bobbins.

     Everything went well. So, I put the book, with fill, on the machine.
  
     Everything went well. Until, the material puckered.

     I was halfway around the bookpage.

     Flipped over the material. Yep, there all the way around, puckered thread from the bobbin.

     I am now going to take my soda, sit in my big chair and watch mindless tv for a while.

      Tune in later for the next installment of " How the Bobbin Turns".
Who knows when.

      Enjoy your day.

E-mail

      Okay, so last time I blogged about Facebook. So, today I went in to my one e-mail account and was forwarding stuff, when I noticed that I had to hand type all my addresses. I was used to having my addresses pop up in blue and just clicking enter and they would magically appear in the address box.  Guess my magic is weak on Mondays.

      So, I tried with another e-mail and got the same results. This time I went to my contacts page. Guess what? I got " Connection refused".  What the heck is that? I don't know whether to kick my computer, call my computer guy or just kick back have a soda and let the world trip on by.

      Yeah, thought about it, and came to my blog to vent.

      I did have a good time on Facebook this morning, though. Posted some and read a lot, so guess I shouldn't be too upset.

      Just not sure I am ready for the 21st century electronic goodies. I think I could still handle a handwritten letter, envelope(pre-sticky) and a stamp. However, at 44 cents and going up, maybe not. And no one answers them anymore. They will comment on my e-mails, facebook, and blog, so guess I will just suck it up and go on. Surely, my bad karma will not continue on my computer.

Have a great day and enjoy your eletronic goodies.

Facebook

     I have as yet, to figure out Facebook.

           I have an account. I use it. I post. I read. I leave.

           I come back, what is posted is sometimes there, sometimes, not. How does this happen? I look at other Facebook pages, and they have their friends listed to the left of the page. I do not. I used to. What have I done?

           It is a bit like life. People come and people go out of my life and sometime I know why, and sometimes not. They just disappear.

           Is there a Facebook gremlin that moves my stuff around on my page?

           I was there just a bit ago and posted something on my wall. I left. I returned and it was not there. Where did it go cyber heaven? Sometimes I see postings from people and enjoy them. I post something to them. It never shows up again. I can post on the like/dislike post and it shows up when posted, but if I leave and come back it probably won't be there. Is it on their wall?

          I don't know if I am computer illiterate or Facebook illiterate, but somehow, I know it is my fault.  I wish it weren't, but you know it is.

           I will probably never figure out Facebook. I will just keep enjoying and asking questions.

           I wonder if anyone else has the issues. Please tell me if you do.

            Thanks for the viewing, and have a great day, until next time.

Being Married

       We have been married for over 45 years and I, at least, am still learning how to do this. 

       I try very hard not to provoke arguments and hurt feelings. But seriously, sometimes, it simply cannot be helped. 

       I argue.

       I get hurt.

       We were watching one of my favorite tv shows the other night, Dancing With theStars, and we both critized one of the celebreties for the way he was dancing. He had his knees bent through the entire routine and even the judges said so.

       The next night was elimination night, so we checked in to see who would be the one to end their dancing. We were down to two couples and the one that was eliminated, was just fine with us. My hubby said, " Why didn't they eliminate the one who bent his knees?" and I said in my most authortative, I know it all voice, " Well, they did."

         He said, " No, they didn't."

         "Yes, they did,"

          He let it drop. Being the smart person he is. 

          So, the next day, I went online to see the elimination news and while reading the report, realized that they had indeed, NOT eliminated the one who bent his knees, even though, I had spit on the sign post and said I was right........I wasn't.

           It took me two days, but while in the car going somewhere I said," Um, the other day, when you said that they should have eliminated the guy with the bent knees?"

           " Yeeeeeeeeees?" He knew what was coming.

            " Um, yeah, they didn't. Sorry I insisted they had, but they didn't."

            Silence.

           " Am I forgiven?", I asked, for me, timidly.

           " Yeah, just don't let happen again.              

            " At least for today." He grinned really wickedly. He knows it will happen again, but he will still love me

            He said so.

            Enjoy your day and remember, laughter is the best medicine.                   

Whatever

      That is such a great word.

              In my world it always meant anything. Whatever. It could be the answer to a choice:beans or corn? Whatever.

              It could be the beginning of a discussion: Whatever were you thinking, or in my southern mind, thinkin'? I wanted to see if the tree limb would hold my weight. Really? It's an inch around. I know, but just had to try. Whatever.

               As you can see, it also was an ending to a discussion.

               Today a lot of young people, read that anyone under the age of 40, use it for everything.

               "Take out the trash."  " Whatever."

               "Time to get up for school."  "Whatever."

                " You need an operation."   "Whatever."

                See? You can use it as an expression of disinterest, acceptance or denial. It works.

               So until next time enjoy your life.   Whatever.